How to lose five pounds in one week.

Pretend like you say, "Hey, Amelia what have you been up to?"
And I answer, "Painting 400 sq feet of floor, that was covered in tar adhesive, until one in the morning for three days straight."
And you're like, "No way!"
And I go, "Yeah, I did. My 5 year old took pics. Wanna see 'em?"
And you go, "Sure!"




"Gee!" You say. "That looks hard."
I'm all modest so I go, "Naw, not really."
"How did it turn out?"
"Oh, Like this..."

And I'm like, "But don't even worry, we coated it with 2 coats of garage sealant to make it nice and tough. So it lasted all of thirty seconds until we moved the furniture in and ripped the paint off the floor in about ten places."
And like, you don't know what to say about that.
And then I start to cry and stuff.
And then you feel uncomfortable, and I feel bad I made you feel uncomfortable, so then I tell you all about our trip to Lagoon instead.



And then I tell you how I call this my Swim Gown, because it is one. And how I was easily the flattest woman under 39 there. (You laugh. But I can tell it's tinged with pity.)


And here is where you tell me how it looks like my kid is frisking his business through his pockets and I get all embarrassed because he totally is.

And then I tell you how my favorite part of the day was that my kids LOVED pioneer village and could have spent 3 hours there. And you get all jealous cause your kids would rather ride rides and eat cotton candy until they puke off the Jet Star 2.
And I'm like, "Wow...weird."
And then I wind it all up with my saying it was fun to see Jared and have him over and the in-laws are all so fun and we had a really, really good time bonding. So we say goodbye feeling good at the end of our chat. And I don't realize until after you leave I forgot to mention I lost 5 pounds with all of this activity going on. But then I realize that it's probably for the best that I didn't bring it up, 'cause that's super braggy to say and stuff.

Up and Running, Blackhoneyvintage.com

Chelsey and I are happy to finally announce we have Blackhoneyvintage.com up and running. It made me stop and think about how this vintage obsession that I have ever got started. And I have to credit some of my friends.

When I was in seventh grade my friend Tiff's older sister owned a store on Center St in Provo. Not sure if anyone will recall it, but it was up some stairs over a little diner that was called 534 or something to do with it's address. There were these little enclosed booths you could sit down and eat in. There were always teen hipsters in black clothes and sailor hats hanging out there. The little store had dressing rooms with hand-prints in different colors all over the walls. I thought it couldn't be more awesome. I would spend every dime I had there. Between those things and the stuff I "borrowed" from my Mom I made up a pretty punk-rock wardrobe. And by punk-rock I mean I got made fun of every single day of my life. Wearing lace gloves with a big tweed man's blazer and cuffed jeans is not cool in Provo Utah in November at the bus stop. It's just not. By the time Tiff and the Grow sisters started wearing cool vintage and Tiff started helping me pick cool stuff I was not laughed at so much and school girls started liking the things I wore. One week I wore a stack of gold necklaces with a German cross pinned at the neck of my collared shirt and by the next week it was a fad. I knew the torment would be over. For a few months at least, until I cut off my hair. That's another story...

After the little store closed down I had to get creative and I just borrowed a lot of clothes for the next few years. Until Sue Andrus took me to DI. I used to pass it and wonder what was going on in there, but I assumed it was some kind of storehouse. Like you had to qualify to enter. But Sue just walked in like she belonged there and we left with some of the most amazing vintage jewelry I still have ever seen, for just pennies. (I still have one of the bracelets.) And that was it for me. I remember shopping weekly in the old DI. When the basement was the best part. Back when the glass cases held all the wonders of the world, like Portobello Road. I miss the old DI. I miss the old pricing structure.

Once DI began to carry new items, (the pine furniture they manufacture), they had to restructure their business. Legally they are required to structure and price their merchandise like Target and Kmart. This is why DI no longer has things priced for a quarter, or fifty cents. It's not because the church needs the money. I personally think it stinks for shoppers. They are too overpriced to want to shop there anymore. It's not any fun. I used to find designer merchandise for two and three dollars. Now dresses can be fifteen to twenty bucks and tables, couches a hundred bucks. It's a rare occasion I find something great for the price I want to pay.

DI originally opened directly after the depression. They realized a need to try and pool extra resources from the saints and begin to redistribute these assets. There used to be drives to raise items. Men would come by weekly and haul stuff away. The church used to ask their members to give as much as possible and gave out DI bags to fill. Not we have so much stuff the DI problem is processing it all and figuring out what is garbage and what is not. I do so enjoy DI dumpster diving. (The sorter's idea of trash is not always my idea of trash.) I wish I could go in every day. I should buy their garbage... I'm looking into that.

So, with this love of mine for old things I hope to bring some joy to people who may love old items as well, but not so much the dumpster diving. I get that that part is an acquired taste. I guess I've acquired it.

Dressers and Front Door in Robin's Egg Blue.

So here are the pictures of the dressers that my friends talked me into keeping. (Like I needed any arm twisting.) I wanted to sell them, but I am just far, far too in love with them. I used this great Benjamin Moore paint that is the only thing I use for furniture anymore.


Here is what they looked like when I brought them home from a community yard sale...


I haven't attached the mirror, yet. It's only one coat short of being done!

I took off all of the pulls and instead of replacing them, I painted them with a special spray paint I have found. 'Cause why tamper with perfection? Some people would think they should do that to update them. Tsk.

Pugmann has to be sure and shake a few hairs in for good luck. Ancient Chinese secret.

And here they are now! Tadadadada do do deeed eed od o ta da ta da tadada dada dada dada da DA!

If you've noticed I have no baseboards, you'd be right! That's #23497 on the to do list.


Aaaand because I loved it so much, I painted my front door this same color.

Wow, I really need to paint my front stoop. It's still covered in glue from the ripped up carpet we pulled off it the day we moved in. I'll add it to the list...#31567...paint...front...stoop.

A day late and...ok a lot of days late...and $500 short.

Well, I finally got my camera and my computer and the right cords and the right memory card all in the same place at the same time. It wasn't easy. So I now have the pictures from the Multi-Master shoot from what, six months ago? But here you go, if you still care at all.

This is what our kitchen looked like for six weeks. Seven? A lot of weeks.


Boy, did the animals love playing in the debris! They dragged it all over my house.


But don't even worry, the Multi-Master crew is here, now. Shhhh, yeah it's all gonna be OK now.




I think here Kent stepped on a nail. Sorry.

New counter tops going in.

Ooooooh, preeeeety.

I love my farm house sink.

Here are the floors going in. I had to es'plain how the pattern was supposed to go at the last minute. They had it wrong. So it slowed us up a bit. But they did it perfect and now I love them.


Jane is looking out the window wondering where her pile of debris went.

Oh, nope. There it is.

The deck.


There's that darn debris pile. And it looks like it's gotten angry. I don't want to see it angry.

I shouldn't have looked in the garage either.

Six months after the make-over we have had some issues with the speedy nature of the remodel. The sink leaks, the doors underneath are pulling off and apart, the tile settled crooked from us walking on them and we have had a lot of grout loss on the tiles. But for the most part it looks good. CERTAINLY better then it did. And one of the tile workers left us a cool used sweatshirt. So thanks for that.

Since these pictures were taken I have painted the kitchen a softer green in my new favorite thing, Benjamin Moore Matte paint. It's washable flat paint. That's right, you heard me. And I picked a cool "greige" for the hallways and entryway. It hides EVERYTHING. Run, don't walk, out and buy some for your house if you have old and ugly wall texture you need to hide. I vowed to never use anything but Benjamin Moore paint ever again.

Coming up...my new dressers!

Stay tuned!